Ex-prisoner：Bravely embarking on the road to transformation
"If I could do it all over again, I wouldn't have taken this path ....."
Translate By: Lew Yen Yue
Image Editing: Thong Ling Hui
Sometimes in life, people inevitably make mistakes. However, when faced with these mistakes and regrets, one has a choice: either dwell on the past or confront them head-on and transform positively. Ming, an ex-prisoner, is actively striving to change himself. Presently, he dedicates his time as a volunteer at the drug rehabilitation center in Semenyih. His intentions extend beyond making amends for his past errors; he also seeks to contribute to society and make a positive impact.
The Shadow of Drug in Adulthood
The age of 18 marks the legal threshold of adulthood, where individuals assume responsibility for their own words and actions. However, Ming, at the age of 18, encountered drugs and subsequently squandered his youth through a series of mistakes and regrets.
In 2008, when Ming was 18 years old, he and a friend were first exposed to drugs in a restroom at a plaza. Unfortunately, security guards discovered them, leading to their detention. As it was Ming's initial offense, the police did not impose a severe punishment, causing him to underestimate the gravity of the situation.
Ming found himself surrounded by delinquents, and they frequently gathered to indulge in drug use. "Due to our immaturity in both age and personality, we spent our days consuming drugs and relied on our group dynamics to harm others. The second time I was arrested by the police was because I assaulted an innocent person, resulting in a broken hand."
Although the police convicted him of assault, they were aware that it was an impulsive act influenced by drugs. Ming himself cannot explain the rationale behind his decision to apologize to the victim, but fortunately, the victim eventually chose not to pursue the matter further. This incident served as a profound wake-up call for Ming, igniting his determination to break free from drug addiction.
From Addiction to Temptation: A Journey of Recovery and Relapse
After successfully overcoming drug addiction at the age of 21, Ming made the decision to pursue further education and chose engineering as his major. Over the course of the next three years, he experienced a fulfilling college life and was resolute in his determination to abstain from drugs and even quit smoking. Reflecting on his first year after graduation, Ming reminisces about a period of satisfying work and a healthy lifestyle.
However, this favorable situation did not last long. Upon entering the workforce, Ming found himself increasingly driven by material pursuits and desires, as his income was no longer sufficient to meet his expenses. Recalling a friend he had met at the age of 18, Ming was under the impression that this individual enjoyed a good income, prompting him to arrange a meeting. "After our meeting, I discovered that he was earning a decent income from his job. This led me to quit my job and relocate to Kuala Lumpur, hoping to improve my standard of living."
Although the job he acquired had no connection to his field of study, it involved coordinating between customers and relevant departments, for which Ming received a commission. Subsequently, enticed by his friends, Ming reintroduced nightlife into his routine and became exposed to drugs once again.
Drugs can be processed into powder form and inhaled through the nostrils to enter the body. (Image Source: Unsplash)
“Ketamine was the first drug to which I was exposed. It comes in the form of a white powder that needs to be finely ground, resembling flour, before it can be inhaled through the nostrils.”
Over time, Ming's exposure to drugs expanded to include a variety of substances, such as heroin, marijuana, and even experimenting with ecstasy. Consequently, he spent an increasing amount of money on drugs. To address their financial difficulties, Ming and his friends made the decision to engage in drug dealing, both for their own convenience in acquiring drugs and to compensate for their monetary losses. Unfortunately, during one instance, Ming was arrested by the police for carrying a significant quantity of drugs.
The Detention Facility Experience
During the period leading up to his conviction, Ming was housed in a crowded facility where the majority of individuals were awaiting sentencing. Initially, Ming had envisioned a prison with comfortable mattresses and pillows, as well as a lock on the toilet. However, the reality turned out to be quite different. The cell only had barred windows on all four sides. People from various nationalities were imprisoned together, and sleeping arrangements required everyone to lie down or sit on the floor. Furthermore, the toilet lacked any privacy, with both the shower and toilet areas visible to others.
Fights are very common in detention facility. (Image source: Unsplash)
He shared that the detention facility was governed by a tyrant-like figure who acted as a leader, and various racial groups formed their own gangs. Joining a gang didn't require explicit confirmation; it was enough to be obedient and cooperate, fulfilling each other's requirements to avoid the risk of isolation or being targeted. Refusing a gang request didn't involve force or threats, but it made it more challenging to fit into their social circle. Moreover, fights were a common occurrence in the detention facility, with conflicts between African and Indian individuals being particularly frequent. While they were perceived as fierce, they were essentially just protecting themselves.
The premises were patrolled by prison officers, and surprise inspections were conducted weekly by other officials. Inmates caught engaging in illegal activities, such as drug use or smoking, faced punishment and might even be placed in a "dark room." The dark room resembled a claustrophobic space, devoid of light, where prisoners had to subsist on bread. This further exacerbated the prisoners' sense of despair.
Ming experienced detention three times, each related to drug-related issues, lasting for three days, six days, and one month, respectively. For the first two offenses, family members bailed him out, but by the third detention, Ming's relationship with his family had become strained. Out of personal pride and dignity, he chose to keep the matter hidden and did not allow his family to bail him out.
Throughout the month-long detention, Ming maintained an attitude of patience and endurance. Despite the deplorable environment and reduced quality of life, he upheld a sense of mutual respect, believing that everything could be resolved through negotiation. It was during this time that he began reflecting on himself. He stated, "I have been nurturing positive thoughts, learning to accept and live with my mistakes, fully aware of the consequences for which I am responsible." He was determined to face his crimes and serve his sentence earnestly, regardless of its length.
Remodelling life: Embarking on the road to transformation
After enduring the torment of drug addiction, Ming gradually experienced a deep sense of loneliness and helplessness. One by one, his friends distanced themselves, and Ming became increasingly withdrawn. Drug addiction not only negatively impacted his mental well-being but also caused severe damage to his body.
"Drug addiction undoubtedly inflicts long-lasting physical harm; claiming otherwise would be a falsehood."
Ming suffered from stomach pain, urinary incontinence, frequent urination, and various other symptoms as a result of the drugs. The hardships of life eroded his hope for the future, and he even contemplated suicide. Fortunately, a change of heart occurred, and Ming mustered the courage to seek a way out of drug addiction. He extensively searched the internet for information until he discovered the House of Victory. In order to gain firsthand insight into their environment, he personally visited the drug rehabilitation center. After engaging in discussions and undergoing assessments, Ming's commitment to overcoming his addiction was acknowledged by the House of Victory, and he was accepted into their drug rehabilitation program as a member.
The Rumah Victory Drug Rehab Centre in Semenyih offers an 18-month drug rehabilitation program for individuals struggling with drug addiction.
Consequently, on December 11, 2021, Ming embarked on his journey to drug rehabilitation. After successfully completing the 18-month program, Ming has confronted and accepted his past mistakes. Having missed out on numerous exhilarating moments during his youth, he now values any opportunity for personal growth and learning. Ming aspires to pursue theological studies, broaden his perspectives, and mold a better version of himself.
Furthermore, Ming has taken the initiative to apologize to the community for his past actions. Although he did not directly harm anyone, he acknowledges that his behavior had adverse effects on others. He deeply understands his own faults and is determined to make amends by striving to become a better person.